I've never felt better about myself in the past few months of so, ever since that fight broke out with my parents. But I knew it couldn't hide forever, that it would slowly creep back into my mind, and engulf my thoughts once more, as if I were doomed to carry such a burden. Whereas the last round was one of despair and hopelessness, this time, there is none of the kind. I can't even associate either forms of my alter-ego Lavender to these feelings anymore, they have long gone. So why is it that when times are at their best, that I feel obligated to die this time?
Gone are the thoughts of killing myself on June 1 because I couldn't take life anymore. In comes being so happy I could die. And a notion is telling me that 28 is such a time. I'm probably going insane. But if I am, I'm loving every moment of it.
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